spigot: DO YOU THINK MICHAEL FARADAY EVER LOCKED HIS PENIS IN ONE OF HIS OWN CAGES deuce: HIS PENIS WOULD THEN BE UNABLE TO SEND ELECTROMAGNETIC SIGNALS OUT spigot: ARE WE TO BELIEVE THAT'S WHAT HE EJACULATES

spigot: PRESSING THE FLIPPER ZERO AGAINST MY PENIS

pants: THE FATTEST, THE GAYEST pants: THE FATTEST AND THE GAYEST pants: WHAT I'M SAYING IS

pants: SUCKING DICK ON MONSTER ISLAND pants: SHORT TUGBOAT TRIP TO ISLE OF NABOOMBU FOR LUNCH (JUST LUNCH) pants: SUCKING DICK ON KONG ISLAND pants: JUST AN 18 HOUR PLANE RIDE TO THE ISLAND OF DOCTOR MOREAU TO SUCK SOME APE-MAN DICK pants: NOW I'M SUCKING DICK AT CLUB PENGUIN

deuce: WHAT'S CHRISTOPHER WALKEN DOING ON ARRAKIS (DESERT PLANET)

spigot: BEATING OFF DOESN'T HURT ANYONE AND IT'S GOOD FOR THE ENVIRONMENT

spigot: DOING NEWTON'S CRADLE WITH MY OWN BALLS deuce: YOUR TESTICLES HAVE AN IMPRESSIVE COEFFICIENT OF RESTITUTION

pants: KNOCK KNOCK deuce: WHO'S THERE pants: INTERRUPTING COW deuce: INTERRUP pants: MMMOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO deuce: KNOCK KNOCK pants: WHO'S THERE deuce: EXTREMELY POLITE COW pants: EXTREMELY POLITE COW WHO deuce: MOO

pants: STEPHEN FRY IS ACTIVELY BATTLING PROSTATE CANCER deuce: WITH WHAT A BROOMSTICK

spigot: WHICH SOPRANOS CHARACTER ON SESAME STREET ARE YOU ??? :beep: BOOP BEEP BOOP BEEP BEEP BOOP BEEP BOOP BOOP BEEP BOOP BOOP BEEP BEEP BOOP BEEP BOOP BOOP BEEP BOOP CLICK CLICK CLICK CLICK CLICK spigot: YOU ARE BADA BERT

pants: SYMANTEC SHOULD HAVE NEVER HALTED ITS DISCOUNT PROGRAM WITH THE NATIONAL RIFLE ASSOCIATION pants: THAT REALLY ACTIVATED MY ALMONDS pants: PLEASE STAND BY WHILE I RECEIVE AN URGENT NOTIFICATION FROM THE SHORT MESSAGING SERVICE BEEP BOOP BOOP BEEP BOOP :text: IF YOU'RE STUCK IN A TOILET pants: ASLK;DJF

spigot: GOD spigot: GRANT ME THE SERENITY spigot: TO LICK THE DICKS I HAVEN'T LICKED spigot: THE COURAGE spigot: TO LICK THE DICKS I CAN spigot: AND THE WISDOM spigot: TO LICK TWO OR THREE MORE DICKS BEFORE BEDTIME spigot: WELL MY NAME IS SPIGOT AND I'M A BIG DUMB DICKLICKER spigot: I'VE BEEN LICKING DICK SINCE OH I DON'T KNOW spigot: THE START OF THIS MEETING spigot: AND I DEFINITELY COULDN'T HAVE DONE IT WITHOUT THE PROGRAM

spigot: WHY ARE HOT DOGS EIGHT TO A PACK WHEN MY ASS FITS TEN spigot: THEY SHOULD MAKE A BLACK VERSION OF DO THE RIGHT THING AND CALL IT DO THE RIGHT THANG spigot: I WILL TOO BRING A NAIL GUN TO THE MACY'S THANKSGIVING DAY PARADE

pants: I WILL BE THE ASHLEY BABBIT OF OXYCONTIN deuce: DO I GET TO SHOOT YOU IN THE NECK pants: ONE FLOPPY TIT FALLS OUT

spigot: SHOULD I HANG MYSELF IN THE DATA CENTER pants: THAT'S NOT WHAT THE DATA CENTER IS FOR

pants: ACTUALLY **HER** NAME IS JACQUELINE REACHER NOW

spigot: CHECK OUT MY NEW KICKS!!! pants: THAT MEANS SHOES pants: ARE THOSE spigot: APPLE-CINNAMON BEAR CLAWS FROM HAPPY DONUTS

deuce: IF I COULD HAVE ANY KIND OF PENIS IT WOULD BE A SEVERED PENIS spigot: IN THAT CASE YOU COULD HAVE TWO OR THREE pants: T SPIGOT HE'S TRYING TO LOSE WEIGHT spigot: THREE SENSIBLY PORTIONED PENISES 5 HOURS APART THROUGHOUT THE DAY AND THEN NO PENISES AFTER 6PM

spigot: HELLO pants: TAKING MOMMY'S STRAP IN YOUR FAT, GAY ASSHOLE spigot: WHO'S CALLING PLEASE pants: TAKING MOMMY'S STRAP IN YOUR FAT, GAY ASSHOLE spigot: I'M HANGING UP NOW

spigot: SPENDING 2024 ON THE TOILET

spigot: ARE WE AS A GROUP CLOSE TO COLLECTING ALL 6 MCNUGGET BUDDIES spigot: ASSUMING WE'RE ALL AWARE THEY CAN MIX AND MATCH CLOTHES, ACCESSORIES, HATS spigot: PLEASE TAKE A HANDOUT

spigot: T PANTS DIDN'T SEE YOU AT THE MCNUGGET BUDDIES SCRUM deuce: HE WAS BANNED FROM THOSE IN 2021 FOR REASONS THEY ARE NOT LEGALLY ALLOWED TO DISCLOSE pants: I PUT THEM IN MY BOTTOM

pants: ERSTWHILE deuce: HERETOFORE pants: GASSY deuce: EBULLIENT spigot: HOMPH HOMPH HOW MANY FRIES AM I HOLDING UP

pants: OPERATION DINNER OUT IS A GO deuce: COPY THAT, FATTY ACTUAL

spigot: CHAD FAMILY ANNIHILATOR pants: VIRGIN WEEKEND DAD

deuce: MY BALLS ARE NON-GMO deuce: (LEANS CLOSER TO MIC) I SAID MY BALLS ARE NON-GMO

spigot: I USE A BURNER HAM RADIO SO NOBODY FINDS OUT I HELP ELDERLY OPERATORS UP THE STAIRS TO PANCAKE BREAKFASTS AT THE OAKS SHOPPING CENTER

spigot: SAY GOODBYE TO YOUR PENIS IF YOU LIVE IN THESE THREE ZIPCODES

spigot: I HAVE THE SQUIRTS AND STILL NO GARLIC BREAD

spigot: I PUT SCALLOPED POTATOES IN THE DISK DRIVE

deuce: I'M KEEPIN' CLEAN IN THE ANTHROPOCENE

spigot: IF YOU WERE SERIOUS ABOUT LOSING WEIGHT YOU'D KEEP SUCKING

deuce: WELL I SURE SLEPT LIKE SHIT dick: AND I DIDN'T POOP VERY WELL pants: WHAT deuce: RIOTING dick: NO TOO TIRED, HAVE TO NAP deuce: JEALOUS pants: WHAT pants: HOLD ON MY HEARING AID IS OFF pants: SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE pants: MAYBE JUST WRITE DOWN YOUR REQUEST AND BURY IT IN THE FOREST

pants: THE GREAT REPLACEMENT THEORY IS WHERE OVER TIME THE EMPTY SPACE IN YOUR MOUTH BECOMES OCCUPIED BY MY COCK

spigot: DID YOU ALL GET MY DICKLICKING LOYALTY VOUCHERS

pants: I NOTICE NONE OF YOU EVEN BOTHERED TO TUNE INTO MY GARDENING LIVESTREAM pants: I DON'T KNOW WHY I BOTHER pants: BOTH OF YOU MISSED OUT ON THE PLANTING OF THE ORANGE HAT TOMATO PLANT spigot: OH THAT WAS TODAY deuce: I WAS BUSY WASHING MY HAIR spigot: NO I WAS THERE JUST IN THE BACK

pants: T SPIGOT IS IT TOO EARLY TO PLANT MY BULBS spigot: YOU MEAN LIKE ON MY FACE

spigot: EXCUSE ME EXCUSE ME EXCUSE ME BEHIND YOU HOT LASAGNA HERE

pants: IT'S THAT TIME OF THE MORNING WHERE I START TO THINK ABOUT SWITCHING FROM A BATHROBE TO SWEATS

pants: WHY DOESN'T BONEQUEST HAVE A PODCAST OR A PONZI SCHEME spigot: THIS / IS HOW / WE DO / IT / FREEZES TO DEATH IN A TENT

spigot: WHAT'S THE POINT OF WHIPPING OUT MY HAND WITH LIGHTNING FAST CAT-LIKE REFLEXES TO GRAB AND SQUEEZE A FRUITFLY IF WHEN I OPEN MY HAND IT FLAPS OUT UNHARMED INTO MY FAT STUPID FACE

pants: DOUBLE SHIFTS AT THE DICKLICKING FACTORY pants: JUST SO I CAN WORK WEEKENDS AT THE CRINGE PLANT

pants: WAY WAY WAY WAY PAST BI-CURIOUS AND RIGHT ON DOWN THE ROAD TO HANGING AROUND THE OLD BARN

spigot: ROUGHLY TEN MILLION CALORIES PER DAY spigot: HE SUCKS THE SAME DICK TWICE IN SUCCESSION YET PRODUCES TWO CLEARLY DIFFERENT TONES deuce: THE VERY DEFINITION OF INSANITY

spigot: A MURDER AT THE END OF MY PATIENCE pants: FOUND: PLUMPERS PASS, ON SIDE OF ROAD, LEFT WITH LOCAL PD spigot: DO WE KNOW HOW MANY PLUMPER POINTS ARE ON IT

spigot: DO I REALLY WANT TO DEFEND MYSELF USING THE WORD TWINK pants: YOUR TWINK DAYS ENDED IN 1995 pants: I DON'T KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO TWINKS AFTER THEY GRADUATE pants: I GUESS THEY GET PHDS

pants: IT'S SUPERBOWL SUNDAY !!! deuce: I'M AWARE spigot: ARE YOU FOLKS WATCHING THE YOUNG SHELDON MARATHON ON PARAMOUNT PLUS effigy: FUCK KANSAS CITY pants: WHERE'S JIMMY G pants: FUCK KANSAS CITY deuce: IS THAT A REAL PLACE spigot: HOLY SHIT YOUNG SHELDON JUST ORDERED A SECOND DESSERT effigy: THEY'RE NOT BOOING THEY'RE SHOUTING JUSZCZYK pants: WHERE'S TAYLOR spigot: THEY JUST FOUND YOUNG SHELDON'S BODY

spigot: IF YOUR PENIS IS CIRCUMCISED WE RESPECTFULLY ASK THAT YOU USE THE :BANANA: EMOJI

spigot: HOW COME WHEN I SUCK DICK IT SOUNDS LIKE A DOT MATRIX PRINTER

pants: MY STARBUCKS LID BROKE deuce: STRETCH YOUR BALL SACK AROUND THE TOP AND SECURE IT WITH A RUBBER BAND pants: CAN I STILL BIKE TO WORK pants: OKAY YOU'RE GONE pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: HOT pants: NOW I NEED ICED COFFEE

spigot: I'M THE **COOL** MATH TEACHER WHO DROPS THE REQUIRED TEXTBOOK IN THE TRASH CAN AND PULLS OUT HIS PENIS INSTEAD deuce: YOUR PENIS HAS MEASURE ZERO spigot: DELETE THIS

spigot: EXCITED FOR MORE TRUE DETECTIVE: SNOOZE COUNTRY FEATURING MUSIC BY DOG SHIT pants: W-WAIT WHERE'S TONY AND SIL AND CHRISTOPHER deuce: A-A-AND CARMELLA???

spigot: CALLING THE FCC AND MY LOCAL CBS AFFILIATE TO COMPLAIN ABOUT ARCHIE BUNKER FLUSHING THE TOILET 53 YEARS AGO spigot: ACTUALLY spigot: I CAN'T DECIDE IF THAT'S ABOVE MY PAY GRADE OR BELOW MY GAY PARADE

spigot: I'M JUST NOT SURE I'D TRUST A RAPE TEST KIT FROM TEMU

deuce: ADULTERATE ME deuce: WAIT, DON'T DO THAT deuce: I JUST LOOKED UP WHAT THAT WORD MEANS deuce: I THOUGHT IT MEANT SOMETHING ELSE deuce: SOMETHING BETTER pants: MMM LET ME TRY

spigot: T DEUCE I SAW YOUR POST ON REDDIT RE: HOW TOM BYRON'S CUMBACK PUSSY IS MORE LIKE TOM BYRON'S SENDBACK PUSSY deuce: FABRICATIONS deuce: SHENANIGANS deuce: SLANDER spigot: IF YOU LIKE LADIES, YOU'LL LOVE WHEN I LADIES NUTS ON YOUR FAT STUPID FACE pants: WHAT KIND OF ANIMAL SMOKES MARIJUANA AT HIS OWN CONFIRMATION

spigot: GETTING IN MY 10,000 DICKS EACH DAY spigot: 🎶 UP / TOWN / FRUITS spigot: I'LL MAKE A MESS OF ALL YOUR BUSINESS / SUITS 🎵 spigot: 🎶 I'M DROPPIN' LOOTS

deuce: CHOKE ME OUT pants: I'M TRYING BUT pants: EXHAUSTED FROM ALL THE POKING (BUT I COULD CHOKE A LITTLE MORE, I DUNNO) deuce: ARE YOU DEAD YET pants: I'M A MOUSE TUMBLING AROUND THE FIELD

pants: BARF ON MY WEIRD LITTLE BONER pants: DON'T MAKE ME BEG pants: ACTUALLY, NEVER THE MIND I MANAGED TO WORK SOMETHING OUT

pants: AVENGE NEX

pants: ALSO AVENGE JANE MOON AND FUCK DREWTOOTHPASTE pants: WHAT IS IT WITH THE STRAIGHTS LATELY pants: DON'T THEY HAVE ENOUGH TO DO

effigy: RAPPER MC LYTE FILES FOR DIVORCE AFTER 3 YEARS OF MARRIAGE deuce: MY TIME TO SHINE deuce: AND SHE MET HER LAST HUSBAND ON MATCH.COM deuce: I KNOW WHAT TO DO deuce: I GOT THIS deuce: CLICKS GRINDR

spigot: THERE'S A WOMAN IN THE LOBBY WHO SAYS YOU OWE HER AND HER FRIEND $600 EACH pants: CAN I DOUBLE DOWN spigot: (WHISPERING) ONE OF THEM LOOKS LIKE A SIR pants: WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA spigot: S-SOMEONE MIGHT BE SLIPPIN' JIMMYING YOU pants: OKAY SO pants: THEY MAY HAVE A BUSINESS CASE ABOUT WHY I OWE THEM A PAYMENT

deuce: T PANTS REMEMBER WHEN RIKER WANTED TO FUCK A HOLOGRAM BUT JUST ENDED UP FUCKING ME MORE IN THE ASS pants: T DEUCE I DO NOT REMEMBER

deuce: ADULTERATE ME (NOT THIS AGAIN) pants: NO NO GO AHEAD pants: LOOSENING SWEATS

spigot: DO WE ALL AGREE THAT IT'S PROBABLY BEDTIME pants: GATHER ROUND AND WATCH ME BEAT OFF spigot: I HAD DIAREAR LAST MONTH pants: GET OFFA ME spigot: GETTING A JUMP ON TOMORROW'S PENISES

spigot: CLICK HERE TO OPT OUT OF CHOPPING YOUR DICK OFF spigot: GUESS I SHOULDA READ THAT

pants: T SPIGOT YOUR BIRTHDAY'S COMING UP AND spigot: I DON'T CARE FOR ANYTHING REPRESENTED IN REAL LIFE OR IN CYBER-SPACE

pants: PUT ME IN THE CORNER pants: THEN DING THE BELL AND I'LL COME OUT FIGHTING deuce: BUT YOU'LL NEVER LEARN YOUR LESSON pants: YOU STICK TO WORKING THE REFS AND I'LL SLOWLY LEVEL UP MY BRAIN DAMAGE deuce: YOU DON'T DING A BELL YOU RING THE BELL BUT THE BELL DOES IN FACT GO DING pants: CAN'T YOU GO ANY FASTER deuce: DING pants: AHLGALGHALG HLUAHGLUAHGLUAH LUGHLAGHNLAG

pants: I APPEAR TO HAVE TORN MY STOCKINGS deuce: I CHIPPED A NAIL, NOW I CAN'T GO TO THE PROM pants: BUT WE CAN GO TO THE MALL TOGETHER!!!!!! HUNTING FOR BOYS AND SBARRO

pants: THE EXPRESS LANE TO MY BALLS: pants: TAKE IT pants: IGUANAS SNAKES RACCOONS POSSUMS BEES DUCKS pants: ONE OF THOSE DOESN'T BELONG IN THAT LIST

spigot: CANCER STICKS pants: NANCY BOOTS deuce: TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT TAYLOR SWIFT

spigot: ALL I KNOW IS ONCE I RETIRE I'LL HAVE TO GROW MY OWN CORN DOGS

deuce: GUYS WE MISSED ADA LOVELACE DAY

spigot: YOU KNOW I JUST REALIZED I'VE BEEN SITTING HERE FOR THREE HOURS AND NOT ONCE HAVE I ASKED _HOW_ MY WIFE AND CHILDREN WERE MURDERED spigot: YES I WOULD LIKE MORE WATER

pants: THIS UNLICKED DICK IS DEDICATED TO THE BRAVE MUJAHIDEEN FIGHTERS OF AFGHANISTAN pants: HALGUHALUGHUALGHLHULAGAG pants: GHLAUHGLAHLAUGHAG pants: BGAULGHBLAHGLHAGLAG

spigot: MY PENIS IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY HELLO FRESH effigy: I AM STILL SPONSORED BY SQUARESPACE

pants: I WOULD LIKE TO "CHOKE THAT SHIT ON DOWN" AS YOU PUT IT pants: FORCE ME TO PLAY IT LIKE A FLUTE

spigot: BUT HERE'S THE THING, FOLKS: CHANDLER HALDERSON NEVER HAD PENIS REDUCTION SURGERY spigot: HE NEVER WENT TO THE MOON spigot: HE NEVER BUILT A TIME MACHINE AND CLONED ADOLF HITLER spigot: THOSE WERE ALL LIES

pants: TRYING TO SCRATCH MY EAR WITH MY BACK FOOT, FALLING OVER deuce: [STAR TREK RED ALERT SOUND]

pants: IS IT TOO LATE FOR FILM SCHOOL I HAVE THIS IDEA FOR A SCRIPT WHERE (YOU HAVE STOPPED LISTENING TO ME) pants: SHOULD I GIVE INTO DESPAIR OR JUST SIMPLY BEAT OFF WHILE ADDRESSING THE AUDIENCE ON CAMERA pants: AHEM DID YOU EVEN NOTICE THE TIP JAR pants: TAP TAP TAP

spigot: LICK MY DICK TO THESE LO-FI BEATS

spigot: :HELICOPTER: spigot: :BOOM: spigot: :MILITARY_HELMET: spigot: WHEN I DIE, BURY ME UPSIDE DOWN SO THE WORLD CAN FUCK ME MORE IN THE ASS

pants: THIS COMMITTEE OWES AN APOLOGY TO MICHAEL CORLEONE

deuce: I THINK YOU HAVE A PURDY MOUTH spigot: DELETE THIS deuce: SHUT

spigot: I HAVE THE WORLD'S GREATEST DRAFTS FOLDER I'M JUST OPENING IT UP TO PAID SUBSCRIBERS spigot: FLOATING UP TO HEAVEN TO BE WITH HITLER spigot: THEORETICALLY COULD A PERSON GET CANCELLED IF THERE WERE A VIDEO OF HIM (OR HER) DOING THE BARTMAN

pants: LET US REMIND OURSELVES THAT WE ARE IN GOD'S PRESENCE

spigot: ARE YOU PUMPING YOUR PATHETIC PENIS FOR THESE GOLDEN BROWN CRINKLE CUT ORE-IDA FRENCH FRIES spigot: OKAY I SENSE AD PLACEMENT spigot: AM I READY TO SHOOT MY LOAD INTO WHAT KIND OF REVERSE MORTGAGE NOW spigot: PLEASE STAY ON TOPIC deuce: BUY GOLD

spigot: NONE OF YOU SEEM TO UNDERSTAND spigot: I'M NOT LOCKED IN HERE WITH YOU spigot: YOU'RE LOCKED UP IN HERE WITH ME AND STOUFFER'S FAMILY STYLE LASAGNA AVAILABLE IN YOUR GROCER'S FREEZER

spigot: I KNOW MY MIC IS ON FUCK YOU (TINKLE SOUNDS)

deuce: ANY POST ON LINKEDIN CONSISTING OF SOMEONE HOLDING UP A WHITEBOARD/WHITE PLACARD WITH WRITING ON IT MAKES ME FEEL SORRY FOR THEM AND ALSO MAKES ME WANT TO MURDER THEM

deuce: ONLY THE BEST PISS deuce: THE FINEST URINE deuce: THE MOST ELEGANT WEE

spigot: DID OUR BUSINESS LICENSE EXPIRE OR CAN I STILL WALK AROUND WITH A TRAY OF BONEQUEST STICKERS LIKE A CIGARETTE GIRL pants: DO YOU EVEN FIT INTO YOUR COCKTAIL DRESS

effigy: ARE WE SO CONFIDENT IN OUR MEASUREMENTS THAT WE _KNOW_ DARK MATTER IS REAL? spigot: ARE YOU MEASURING FAIRLY OR STARTING AT THE BALLS

spigot: DO U DARE ME TO SUCK MY OWN DICK spigot: I KINDA NEEDA YES/NO

spigot: I'M SAD THAT I'M DRINKING MY LAST GUINNESS spigot: AND I'M SAD THAT I'M TOO LAZY TO GET MORE GUINNESS spigot: BUT HOW GRATEFUL AM I THAT DEUCE IS ON HIS WAY TO MY HOUSE IN A SELF-DRIVING CAR TO DELIVER MORE GUINNESS AND THEN HOPEFULLY LEAVE IMMEDIATELY pants: DEUCEDASH

pants: FORCE ME TO DRINK FROM THE URINAL deuce: FOLD, SPIN AND/OR MUTILATE ME pants: THE UNITED STATES POSTAL SERVICE TAKES A DIM VIEW OF YOUR COMMANDS

effigy: TODAY AIN'T SATURDAY pants: SO IT'S SUNDAY THEN?? effigy: DUNNO. JUST WOKE UP BECAUSE MY RABBIT HOLE IS FULL OF WATER pants: YA GOTTA DIG AT AN ANGLE AT THE START effigy: SHIT

spigot: DON'T BRING MORE FROZEN CORN DOGS INTO THE HOUSE UNTIL I'VE SAT ON THE EXISTING ONES pants: ARE YOU A COP pants: IF YOU ARE, YOU HAVE TO LICK MY DICK

pants: BEAT ME OFF AT THE HENRY MILLER MEMORIAL LIBRARY

spigot: TIME FOR MY 10AM PINT OF ICE CREAM FOLLOWED BY MY 10:30 PINT AND THEN I THINK I'M DUE FOR A PINT AT 11 effigy: TOTES BULK UP BRO spigot: CHRIST JESUS I'M LATE FOR MY 11:30 PINT effigy: FOCUS!

pants: AND THEN A DIFFERENT DICK (A TOTALLY DIFFERENT DICK THAN THE ONE BEFORE)

deuce: HEY EVERYBODY WHAT'S UP

deuce: T PANTS THIS IS THE EPISODE WHERE TOM PARIS CROSSES WARP 10 AND TURNS INTO A SMALL AMPHIBIAN AND KIDNAPS JANEWAY, TURNS HER INTO AN AMPHIBIAN TOO, AND TRIES TO FLEE AND KNOCKS HER UP AND THEY HAVE BABIES pants: AH YES THE FROG RAPE EPISODE deuce: RIGHT, THE FROG RAPE EPISODE

:first: ANGRY BUT NOT FOR LONG YOU'LL SEE pants: FART CONDITIONS OVERNIGHT: BURSTY pants: UPGRADED TO SCATTERED deuce: LET US KNOW IF WE GET TO SPOTTY BECAUSE THEN IT'S A REAL MESS

pants: CHANGES ARE IN THE WIND FOR FULL-SIZE LUXURY AUTOMOBILE OWNERS

spigot: ICED LEMON POUNDCAKES FROM STARBUCKS ARE BEST STRAIGHT FROM THE BAG BUT THEY NEED TO PUT THEM IN THE RIGHT WAY deuce: NAMELY, ASS-FIRST

spigot: I SERVED AT FORT FART deuce: LET'S SEE YOUR DD214 spigot: IT'S UH spigot: HERE IT IS: :HAMBURGER:

spigot: WHEN WOMEN THREATEN TO CALL HR I SAY PUFNSTUF????????? AND THEY FORGET ABOUT THE GROPES CAUSE NOW THEY SOUND DUMB

pants: PISSING 33% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 66% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE pants: PISSING 99% COMPLETE deuce: SOME LEAKED

pants: PUT BABY IN MIMIC MOUTH PUT BABY IN MIMIC MOUTH

pants: SUCKING DICK IN THE TOMB OF JESUS

pants: WHAT IF INSTEAD OF A 3 BODY PROBLEM IT WAS A 900 PENIS PROBLEM AND THEN INSTEAD OF 900 PENISES IT WAS A COOKIES, CAKES AND PIES PROBLEM AND WE HAD OUR OWN NETFLIX SHOW CALLED COOKIES, PIES AND CAKES AND IT WASN'T A PROBLEM AT ALL pants: COOKIES, CAKES AND PIES RENEWED FOR SECOND SEASON, CORBIN BERNSEN TO JOIN CAST AS REGULAR

deuce: SUDDEN INFANT DIARRHEA SYNDROME spigot: ASKING YOU POLITELY TO LOOK FOR WORMSIGN

spigot: CARROTS AND CELERY ARE THE REAL CANCER STICKS spigot: WEIRDLY I HAVE NO PROBLEM WHITTLING ZUCCHINIS INTO THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL spigot: I WHITTLE THEM UNTIL THEY'RE GONE AND WE CAN'T HAVE ZUCCHINI

pants: 4:00 PM COFFEEDRINK pants: I'M ON A NEED TO KNOW BASIS!!!!!!!!! AND I NEEDS TO KNOW!!!!!!!!! SHOW ME YOUR COCK pants: WHY AM I TYPING THESE HORRIBLE THINGS

spigot: I'M SO PROFOUNDLY EMBARRASSED FOR OUR SOLAR SYSTEM

:hey: OUR SHIT HERE: WWW.BONEQUEST.STORE pants: FRACTURE MY FACE deuce: WITH A PENIS pants: AND THEN ANOTHER (TOTALLY DIFFERENT) PENIS deuce: A FLOTILLA OF PENISES deuce: EVENTUALLY GROWING TO AN ARMADA